


untitled

by bordle_OWO



Category: Homestuck
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-01
Updated: 2019-01-01
Packaged: 2019-10-01 23:15:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,543
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17253209
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bordle_OWO/pseuds/bordle_OWO
Summary: Dave had been acting weird around Dad ever since he finally came to stay in your house permanently. Although it made sense that he’d act differently; he had watched his Bro get beat up by a suburban dad in a fedora.





	untitled

**Author's Note:**

> yeah idk man. pretty unfinished. I know the ship is problematic and all that and i understand. this is just my personal escapism stuff...

Dave had been acting weird around Dad ever since he finally came to stay in your house permanently. Although it made sense that he’d act differently; he had watched his Bro get beat up by a suburban dad in a fedora.

He had been visiting your house for a week over summer break when it happened. It was a common occurrence to find you and Dave sprawled across the couch playing video games or watching a movie whenever he visited. Dave’s shirt had been riding up as he contorted himself on the couch, nearly upside-down. Just when you were about to win, your dad walked into the living room, distracting you long enough for Dave to eke ahead of you, taking first place.

“Aw, darn it,” you whined, “Daaad, you distracted me. I would have won.”

You had expected him to snark back or something, but he was staring at Dave, silent. You looked at Dave, but couldn’t find anything out of the ordinary. When he finally noticed dad’s gaze, Dave somehow turned his body around so he was sitting normally.

“Sup Mr. Egbert? Admiring my lithe, young body? Finally succumbed to my charm?” Dave is a strange combination of overly polite and inflammatory to Dad, and most authority figures if you’re totally honest. That is until recently.

Rather than respond to Dave’s verbal prodding, Dad paused before asking quietly to see Dave in the other room. That was weird, he hadn’t seemed angry when he came in originally.

Dave didn’t seem to think there was anything wrong. Or maybe he thought something was very wrong. It’s hard to tell sometimes. Either way, he silently followed your father into another room.

They stayed in there for a while, presumably talking about what made Dad so silent. Whatever they talked about, it took what seemed like hours. It probably did. You got bored after a while and decided to watch some show that you’d fallen behind on since Dave arrived. He wouldn't be caught dead watching some of your shows.

When they finally reemerged, your dad put his hands on Dave’s shoulders. Surprisingly, Dave didn't flinch like he often does with physical contact. you missed whatever Dad said to him, but Dave nodded, so it was probably not a big deal.

 

It didn't end up seeming relevant until the end of the week. Dave's bro flew up from Texas to collect him, but when he arrived, Dad didn't seem very happy to see him. Not that he did usually. He generally put up a thin veneer of magnanimity for politeness’ sake, but this was something new.

You don't think you’ve ever seen your dad this angry. It’s kinda scary, to be honest. The pure, unadulterated hatred you could see in your dad's eyes was palpable.

You don't know exactly what happened next because Dad told you to go to your room and like hell you were going to disobey him when he looks like he could murder someone. You and Dave hang around in your room, awkwardly not discussing whatever is happening downstairs. Dave hadn't started packing up, but you weren't gonna say anything.

When a deafening crash comes from downstairs, though, you and Dave immediately rush to the top of the stairs.

“You are an absolutely despicable creature and I will not let you near my son or his friend ever again,” you hear your dad almost hiss. You didn't know his voice could do that. Would he ever talk to you like that? Maybe if you killed someone? You could barely imagine that he’d use that tone even then. What could Bro have done? You know he's been a bit of a shitty guardian, but if it was bad enough to warrant your dad’s wrath it must be worse than you thought.

Shit, if it's worse than you though how is Dave holding up. You look over and see him clenching his jaw as he listens in on the conversation. You nudge him and he jumps slightly.

“Hey dude, you okay?” you whisper.

He doesn’t get a chance to reply because another crash comes from the kitchen. You’re beginning to feel concerned for your dad; you know Bro is skilled at fighting, but the most you’ve ever seen your father fight is when you’d strife-if you could even call it that-playfully when you were feeling rebellious.

You start to sneak down the stairs, and Dave follows you. The sight that greets you when you both reach the kitchen is as amusing as it is terrifying. Dave’s bro has a sword out and is attacking your dad who is, surprisingly, countering his every swing with a frying pan and holding his own.

Dave seems surprised by this too, letting out a gasp that distracts Bro just long enough for your dad to hit him over the head with the frying pan. Bro drops like a puppet whose strings have been cut.

Somehow, the attack has bent the pan, and you know that pan. That's the cast iron frying pan that has been passed down for generations in your family. You couldn't even lift it until you were ten years old. Holy shit.

Setting the badly dented pan on the counter, Dad rushes over to Dave. That makes sense. He just saw his “all-powerful Bro” get knocked the fuck out by an average suburban dad.

“Dave, are you okay?” he asks. Dave nods slightly. You can't tell, but based on his reactions, his eyes are probably blown open behind his shades.

In the most surprising move you've seen today, and that's saying something, Dave lurches forward and hugs your dad tight. Dave never initiates contact.

After half a minute of this, you begin to feel awkward. You don't want to leave in case one of them notices, but you have no idea what’s going on.

When you open your mouth to voice this thought, your dad catches your eyes with a look that says “not a word”.

After what you just saw, you're not liable to disobey him until you’re his age.

 

Later that night, over warm apple cider, you discuss the events of the day as a group. Dad had taken you aside earlier and explained what had been happening while Dave secluded himself in your room. Your dad didn't let that last too long, but you think it was a good idea to let him have some time to himself, especially when the cops came.

Your dad handled everything with the police like a perfect gentleman. With the sword as evidence, it was easy to claim self-defense and procure a later date to follow up on charges with.

You end up sitting and silently drinking your cider while Dad and Dave discuss the future. They decide that the best plan of action would be for Dave to stay at your house until college or whatever dave plans to do. You and Dave are both 18, so at the very least you don't have to deal with custody issues.

Your dad says he will deal with the procurement of Dave’s personal items, which seems to relieve Dave. It makes sense, he’s had to deal with a lot. You kind of want to find Bro and put another dent in the pan yourself.

Ultimately, things fall into a similar rhythm to what you had become accustomed to before the whole debacle. Except for how Dave acts around Dad.

He doesn't act like he's scared or anything, which you are endlessly glad for, but it's still weird. You want to ask him about it, but you don't want to put too much on him after everything.

He's started acting cagey whenever the topic of your father comes up, but in a positive way. He’s always polite to a tee whenever he interacts with him, citing southern manners if your dad asks. He's even started finding excuses to hang out with your dad instead of you, which is less weird because he can't only hang out with you, but still.

You hope it's some form of hero worship, but something seems off. You have no idea what else it could possibly be.

It all comes to head when you return home from piano lessons one night. You let yourself in quietly because they could be watching a movie for all you know, and you don't call out that you've arrived. They both know when your lesson ends.

You walk into the kitchen and freeze. Dave is kissing your dad. On the mouth. Oh god, that's so fucking weird.

You seem to have voiced your confusion because your dad pushes Dave away. Dave takes one look at you and absconds. You’ve never seen him flashstep, but it’s somehow cooler than it sounds. He disappears in less than a second.

With one of the perpetrators absent, you turn your stunned gaze to your father. Who Dave kissed. Or was kissing Dave. What the fucking goddamn shit?

“What the fuck?”

“Language,” he reprimands on habit. “I understand what this looks like, son, but I swear to you I did not initiate the contact.”

Shit, you hadn't thought of that. what if that's why Dave was acting weird.

“Then what did happen? This is so messed up,” you groan.

Your dad sighs. “David kissed me after he confessed to budding feeling for me. Of the amorous sort. I did not have a chance to properly and politely reject him. It would be inappropriate to take advantage of his obvious hero worship.”

“So you like him back?”

“I'm not going to lie to you. I do return his feeling, I am also aware of the many reasons it would not work out. Not only is he your friend, and your age for that matter, but he has likely developed these feeling due to my rescue him. It would be ungentlemanly and immoral of me to forge a relationship with him.”

You breathe a sigh of relief. Wait. Your dad likes your friend. Your best bro. Who wants to mack on your dad. What. The. Fuck.

“This is still messed up. I'm gonna just, go wherever Dave didn't and think about this.”

And think about it you will. It's hard to react properly when you are in shock.

You end up going to the guest room because Dave seems to be in yours, and you are not confronting that.

You lie down on the guest bed and try to process what you just saw. Dave kissed your dad. Because he likes him. In a romantic way. And that's why he's been acting weird. At least it's not life-threatening. Your dad likes him back.

That's the weirdest part. You aren't too surprised that Dave would end up crushing on an older guy-he had talked enough about celebrity crushes once he finally comes out to you in junior year, and boy was that a time- but this is your father. Your best friend put his mouth on your father's mouth and God that's disgusting.

It's weird to think about your dad kissing anyone, much less Dave, to be honest. The worst part here is that your father admitted to liking him back.

When you think about it though, at least Dave's crushing on your father who will think twice about bedding an 18-year-old who just left an abusive household, rather than some skeezy old dude looking for a nubile young man.

You don't want to think about that either. You don't want to think about any of this. You decide to just see if you can sleep off the whole thing.

 

You don't dream. You're roused from your sleep by a gentle prodding and someone saying your name.

“Hey, John, wake the fuck up, we have shit to talk about.”

You've never taken naps well, so you only grunt in response.

“Okay dude have it your way, burger king style. I’ll talk you make inhuman noises of fatigue. One grunt for ok two for fuck off.”

You know you have to talk to him at some point, so you decide it might as well be while you have an excuse to not respond. You grunt once.

“Ok. Cool. Cool. Let’s, uh, do this. We’re making this happen. So you saw me kissing your dad. That's probably fucked up to you. I’d be fucked up if I saw Bro kissing someone. I mean I saw him with worse but never kissing, but that's abuse for you.” He pauses, seemingly unsure if joking about his trauma is a too soon thing. You feel him shrug, so you assume he decided to not give a shit.

“But like. I genuinely like your dad. God, that sounds weird. You know, he asked me to call him James. I think it was intended to be like an ‘I'm not another oppressive power in your life’ or whatever. I don't really care about that. You guys have been like a safe place for years; I don't think I could ever see either of you as dangerous.

“And like I know James, or your dad do you care?” He doesn't give you any time to respond, even if you knew how you would. “So James could beat my ass in 20 seconds no question. Have you seen him? Wait, shit, we’re getting back into weird territory.

“It's not just a hot dilf thing though? He’s like? Perfect. He's always so ready to help me with anything and wants me to do and be my best. Rose would have a field day with this. She’d be all like ‘David this is probably due to the lack of a father figure in your life’ like damn I'm not here to hear about my years of abuse I just wanna make out with John's dad. And we’ve gotten back to this. I'm sorry. Honestly, I'm sorry for all of this. I swear I didn't mean to like do this maliciously.”

This gets you to sit up. “Dave.” He stops rambling and stares at you. Even with the shades, you can tell he is nervous. “How the fuck. Would you have seduced my dad maliciously.”

He’s shocked enough to freeze completely. You can't help but laugh. He joins you, and the tension is broken.

“Ok but seriously. I just wanna make sure we’re cool. I won't apologize cause like… If I’m gonna have legit feelings no one's gonna stop me, but I won't harass your dad or you or anything. I probably should’ve said something to you first, to be honest, but it's just. He makes me feel so safe.”

That's more evidence for hero worship.

“Dave, you're my best friend and I want you to feel safe, of course, but I'm still going to ask you to not pursue my dad. It’s just. God, he described this better than I could. Speaking of that, did you talk to him?” Dave looks guilty at that. “That's a no then. Look I'm still processing this and yeah you kinda fucked up, but I'm not mad at you. You gotta talk to my dad though.” You hope your dad doesn't mention that he was open to the prospect because that would not help deter Dave. He probably would in some gentlemanly effort to be as transparent as possible.

Dave nods, appearing nervous. You would be too if you had to talk to someone you kissed that didn’t like you back. Except your dad does. That's still freaking you out. You need more sleep.

Dave pats your thigh through the blanket awkwardly and stands. “Guess I better get the most awkward Talk capital T of my life done.” He manages to make it seem like he’s being sent to the gallows. He probably feels like that.

Luckily, it's not your problem because you're not the one who developed feelings for your best friend's dad. You fall back asleep as soon as he closes the door.

 

When you wake up again, this time naturally, it’s night. You only manage to lay in bed for a few minutes before your stomach reminds you that you didn't eat dinner. You stay in bed for another few minutes, trying to ignore it.

You wander out of the guest room and look at the hall clock. It says that it is ten thirty-five. Arguably not late-late, but later than you usually eat dinner. It’s summer though, so whatever.

You plod down the stairs towards the kitchen, but hear noises in the living room. Deciding to investigate, you walk into the living room. On the couch is a sight you never wanted to see again. Your Dad and Dave were kissing again. This time there was no way to claim that Dave had made the first move. Your father was on top of Dave, pushing down Dave’s wrists.

“What the hell,” you manage to get out. This gets their attention.

Your dad falls off the couch, and Dave sits up and looks at you, glasses off and eyes wide.

“Oh. Uh. Hey, John. About this. Well, uh.” He stops and looks down at your Dad who is getting off the floor. “Help,” he whispers.

Your dad straightens his clothes.

“John, you have all rights to know about this. Dave and I,” ok he called him Dave. that’s almost as weird as Dave calling him James, “have discussed this relationship like rational adults and decided to give a relationship a try. We, of course, understand if you are uncomfortable with this, but we ask that you abstain your judgment until we discuss this further.”

Okay. This is. If they're not going to stop themselves on their own merit you have to. You don't know what you have to do.

Hypothetically, there's nothing wrong with this relationship. You went through Rose’s sensitivity training same as everyone else when she got fed up with your ignorance. There is an inherent imbalance in relationships with such varied ages, especially since you know that this is an age irrelevant kind of this rather than age-based. At least you hope so. You know Dave should know better than to do that, and he did say that he genuinely cares about your father.

You don't want to have to think about this.

“Ok, I understand that you guys have made a decision. It's not my problem and it’s weird as shit,”

“Language”

“It is weird as shit though. Anyway, I don't care as long as I don't have to hear about it or see it or anything like that. Just,” you sigh, “Please make sure this is healthy. Dad, you brought up a lot of issues earlier. Are you sure you resolved all of those? I don't want this to become unhealthy or go wrong in any way.”

You can think of so many ways this could go wrong. You don't want to have to choose a side. You don't want to think about this.

“I'm gonna,” you point weakly at the entrance to the kitchen, “Just get some dinner and head to bed. Or back to bed, I suppose.”

Before you make it into the kitchen you hear Dave call out, “Wait. John.”

You pause.

“We need to talk about this,” it's your dad now.

Yes, you know it's important to talk and all that but you are still in shock from seeing your best friend and dad playing tonsil hockey for the second time in one day. God, if they continue this relationship that number will only rise.

“We sure do,” you manage to reply, “Tomorrow or something. I'm not mad.” You really aren't. You're just, you don't know, confused, you guess. “I just need some time.” Time that they obviously had, since they managed to get that far together.

You’re almost glad you interrupted them when you did; if they had gotten any farther before you arrived you think you might have died. Although, your dad wouldn’t be so crass as to… You know… On the couch. Ok, no, stopping this train of thought you don't want to think of your best friend doing that, much less your dad. Gross.

 

As the days pass, you are relieved to notice that not much seems to have changed. You’re not sure if its because they're taking it slow or if its because they know you’re uncomfortable about it, but you don't see so much as a touch of affection. You managed to avoid the talk with them about it, but you can tell that your dad is close to cornering you about it. He looks at you too long sometimes, and you know he’s thinking about the whole dating your friend conundrum.

Nothing happens until they both manage to corner you in the living room one night under the guise of a movie night. Considering the look on Dave's face, you're not entirely sure you’re the only one who’s been cornered.

“We all know that we need to talk about this.” 

Your Dad gestures between himself and Dave.

“Do we really,” whines Dave. So you were right about him being as avoidant as you are. At least you're not alone.

“Yes, Dave. Not only is it probably strange to John that I'm dating anyone, but I've entered into a relationship with his best friend. We need to clear the air.”


End file.
